Always a sure source of affection, my grandparents were hugely important figures in my life. They would shower my sisters and me with sweets, indulgences and stories, sharing tales about my parents as naughty children. When the last of them died, we all wondered who would hold the family together. People have relied on grandparents in Britain since the Industrial Revolution, when whole families moved into cities from the country to get work in the new factories, taking grandmother along to look after the children. Despite the fact that more grandmothers are working now, grandparents are still the backbone of childcare in Britain. They provide 44% of full-time care for pre-school children, which makes you wonder how the country would manage without them. The traditional image of a grandparent is a smiling old person surrounded by a cohort of happy children, but this doesn't match the facts. But what we have now is the so-called 'beanpole family', thinly stretched over several generations, with fewer family members in each and with growing numbers of single-parent families. Grandparents are getting younger; more than 50% of grandparents have already had their first grandchild by the age 54. For many of them, grandparenthood means juggling a job, involvement with grandchildren and, sometimes, the care of their own parents. It is up to us to balance the demands we make on them if we don't want to wear them out. Grandparents are such a valuable part of the family that we just cannot do without them.